Inquire Within (Maureen)

[Parker Lee Jones]

Her mohawk was neatly slicked back and bobby-pinned, her jewelry was clean and switched out with small silver studs, and she had a thick layer of foundation on to avoid any color-changing accidents.

In short, Parker was about as respectable as she got. The fact that the make-up took forever was really all that kept her from bolting, because 'personal shopper' was an unfamiliar concept to her and she kind of assumed her prospective employer was some mobility-impaired little old lady who needed errands run (which was really why she'd gone through the effort of the make-up -- Parker was a good sport when it came to humoring old people because they'd be dead soon, everyone else could just suck it up).

Instead the address she'd gotten for the interview was a very, very upscale office building -- the law offices of Maureen Garrett-Schmitt, apparently. The receptionist had remained totally deadpan when Parker said she had an appointment, which was probably a good sign. Still, Parker didn't really expect to come away with this with anything more than a slightly interesting experience.

Then she got her Ms.-Garret-Schmitt-will-see-you-now from the secretary and, well, here we went.

[Maureen Garrett-Schmitt]

Lounging in her elegant (and expensive) office, Maureen Garrett-Schmitt absently flipped through the file on her latest client.

She'd thought New York was a hot bed for criminals... Oh, Miami was so much better. She and Tom were making a mint...

Not that she really needed another one, but one did have to keep an eye on the future.

Besides, she loved her job. The look one someone's face when she absolutely crushed them, the web of power and favors... and of course, working beside her best friend and favorite nemesis.

But it ate into her time like a hungry hippo.

Which meant she always had a personal shopper on her payroll.

The last of which had had a nervous break down.

Honestly, she'd only sent the silly woman out to pick up a few little things.

That said, she was looking to hire a new one.

So when her lovely secretary (with his equally lovely poker face and ability to face down anything that came through the door) told her the potential new employee had arrived, she took a moment to make sure she looked perfect and then announced she'd see them.

And oh. Oh this was going to be perfect.

She could already see the looks on faces when this young woman went shopping for her...

After all, she did have a sense of humor...

[Parker Lee Jones]

Parker's idea of a Professional Woman involved shoulder-pads, toughness, a and a certain degree of either masculinity, dowdiness, or both.

Mrs. Garret-Schmitt was neither masculine nor dowdy, which meant she ahd to be really, really tough. And 'not dowdy' was an incredible understatement, actually. She looked like a pin-up brought to life -- flawless, that was the word. She wasn't exactly the kind of person whose heart skipped a beat for pretty, never had been, but she noticed. The hard little knot of envy in Parker's chest, reserved for pale brunettes who looked striking rather than sickly, swelled a little.

She seemed to visibly prickle as she sat in the char in front of Maureen's desk, though mercifully it was unaccompanied by a defensive color shift or darkening of her eyes.

"I'm Parker Jones, you called me about the... personal shopper job?" Parker says it with the deadpan levelness that she saves for when she's just shut down. She already expects this crisp, perfect woman to make fun of her.

[Maureen Garrett-Schmitt]

"It's a delight to meet you Miss Jones. I'm Maureen Garrett-Schmitt, but then you already knew that. Please call me Maureen. And I'm so glad you decided to come for an interview. Although this isn't exactly an interview. You're a shifter, aren't you dear? I try to hire them whenever I can. Now, do you occasionally look more... creative?"

...She debated for a moment. Before smiling.

"You see, I must admit to taking a bit of pleasure in surprising people, and you would be perfect, really you would. So, I'm going to assume you'll take the job? Starting pay is $30 an hour. You'll be expected to be on call 24/7, but you'll be paid for ten hours of work a day, whether I call you or not. When I do call you, I'll give you a shopping list and the locations where the stores are, as well as sending a car to pick you up. If you do well, you'll receive raises and bonuses. I'll give you a charge card which you can use to buy yourself things. I like to ensure my employees are happy. And please, when you're out shopping, wear what you find comfortable. If you shock those in the stores, I'll give you a nice little bonus. Is that acceptable?"

She was... animated. Eyes bright, smile amused and hair still perfect. And clearly looking forward to the idea of sending a dark clad, piercing bedecked woman into the most exclusive shops in Miami and make the employees there panic...

[Parker Lee Jones]

To be honest, Parker's brain pretty much stopped registering words at '$30 an hour, 10 hours a day'. Or to put it another way -- rent every two days, a week's groceries in an hour. She felt weirdly... disengaged, distant. Because stuff like this didn't happen in her life. It was never this easy, there was always a catch.

And suddenly, Parker doesn't give a shit. Whatever, so Mrs. Garrett-Schmitt thinks it'll be funny, she can live with that. Parker will take her money until the joke wears thin. She smiled, and it was all teeth. Her skin went all wall-colored, making her make-up look like an unpleasantly blotchy mask. "I can do shocking. When do I start?"

[Maureen Garrett-Schmitt]

"Oh you are perfect aren't you? Feel free to torment people as much as you see fit. And you can start whenever you like. I have a contract drawn up if you care to sign it. If you'd like to pop next door, I'm sure my partner can look it over for you if you like."

Her own smile, for a moment, went very sharp, almost shark like before it returned to it's normal red painted sweetness.

"I do want you to enjoy yourself Miss Parker. So if someone particularly annoys you, feel free to torment them as you see fit..."

She paused and then added "And if anyone gives you lip for being a shifter, please tell me. I do so love suing people like that for discrimination."

"Now, if you want to start today, I have a list handy, a card and a car you can take. If not, simply call me when you'd like to start. I do request you do it within the week though. I'd hate to have you bustling about on the weekend, and of course, you don't get paid until you start."